What went wrong?

Ansul, 30 years old, owner of one major construction company in Delhi, had just finished his work at 8 PM on a usual Saturday. He went to the gate of his mega structured building,whoosh came a black Jaguar XF and driver came running and opened the rear door. Ansul got inside quietly without making remarks as if he has many things running in his mind.

“Take me to the hospital” said Ansul. The driver without asking any further question drove him to the hospital that Ansul visits frequently.

Ansul stood in front of the hospital, took out a Marlboro and lighted it. As the smoke got denser coming out of his mouth, his eye’s got wet. There was something that he could not forget and tears started rolling.

Not long back, 4 years ago, Ansul had finished his MBA from a reputed University in London. He was full of energy and was fair, tall and handsome. Any girl would fall for this guy who was a topper in his university and had smartness in his looks. He had returned back to India as he had promised his father, Mr. Ashok, that he will assist him in his business once he completes his PG.

Unwilling to come back, he was forced by her mother’s promises. But something had changed terribly for him. Ansul’s father could feel a sense of discomfort in the air as only in couple of days, Ansul had fought more than the number of hours in a day! Ansul was randomly going out of the house without informing his whereabouts. Returning home at 4.00 AM was becoming his usual habit. Most of the times, he was drunk and there was always a cigarette in his hand. His voice kept on rising. He was always a pampered child and had got all his dreams fulfilled by his father as a kid. Mr. Ashok was a very well-known business person in the world of entrepreneurship. Mr. Ashok had already built an empire for his son to look after. All big business world leaders knew Mr. Ashok as a go getter, a professional by character and a true gentleman by nature. In short, Ansul had access to everything. Money was never an issue for him.

A year passed on but Ansul’s behavior was getting erratic and unruly. He stopped conversing with his parents. Most of the times he will be out for weeks, partying with his so called most caring friends  not realizing that they were using his money and power for their own entertainment. Ansul had 3 break up’s in a year. A night without girls, drinks and drugs was unimaginable for him.

Mr. Ashok being concerned had used all possible methods – by advising, scolding, threatening, talking, etc but none worked. It had an adverse effect on Ansul. He became more arrogant and started using abusive language and showed erratic behavior to his parents. Mr. Ashok realized that this must end but was also aware that it will take toll in his life to get his son back.

Ansul night outs and high on drugs started showing results in couple of years. His eyes had lost its charm and health stated deteriorating badly. Slowly he started to lose his so called friends. Seeing this, Mr. Ashok had an impact too. His health took the toll going bad to worse. He lost interest in his business and slowly in 5 month’s time the loss in his company was growing up. Employees in his companies started to leave from his company more frequently. All was not well!

Finally on September 5th, 2010, everything came to a standstill; Mr. Ashok had faced an accident when he was driving himself. He had a head on collision with a truck while he became absent minded while thinking about his son. He was admitted in ICU and his condition became very critical. Ansul was in a usual party at his farm house and his phone rang. It was his mother and he picked up, a very shrill voice “please come to the hospital. Your father had an accident and he is critical” and teary voice could be felt by Ansul. Something had hit him then and he could not understand anything. He shouted “stop the music, my father, my father….” and tears started rolling down his cheeks. His hands started shaking and imagination made him more scared thinking of his father lying in ICU in a pool of blood. Suddenly all flash back came gushing to him  – the way his father took him to school when he was a kid, the way he was gifted his first cycle, the way his father use to sit all night long when he was sick and the way they use to be best friends.

Ansul drunk and high on drugs drove his car at the highest possible speed and reached hospital in a matter of 20 minutes. He went running towards the ICU, his mother was crying profusely. All his father’s friends and his office colleagues were talking to the doctor in front of ICU. Ansul went running towards his mother and hugged her tightly and said “Don’t worry mom, I am here now. Nothing can happen to dad”. He saw his father who was in a life support and his head was full of blood. Ansul could not stand for a minute and started crying too loudly. A very close friend of his father, Mr. Sinha, came running to him and said “We need blood for your father immediately”. Ansul very well knew that his father’s blood group was B-, a rarest one and his was too. Mr. Sinha told, “Ashok needs blood and the hospital is not having it now as it is a very rare group. We have searched in all places and checked at all blood banks too. No one able to provide it. Only one place, the group is matching but it will take 4 hours to reach here. We don’t have time. Do you know someone among your friends who can help us immediately?”

Ansul in a chocked voice “Mine is B-, please take all my blood but save my father. I cannot survive without him”. He went running with the doctor and they checked his blood sample. Doctors came out and told something to Mr. Sinha. Ansul went towards Mr. Sinha and said “Why are they not taking my blood, what’s wrong?”

Mr. Sinha with a very depressed voice told “Though your blood group matches but you cannot give as you are high on drugs and blood is not fit now to be transfused to your father’s body. We have to wait but we don’t have time”. Ansul was shaken off by this as he could not believe that he was not able to save his father. Ansul pleaded holding the doctors hands to save his father and said not to worry about money. His body started shaking and went down on his knees praying to god.

Everyone started calling every possible friends, colleagues, acquaintances but time was running out. Ansul with his mother went to his father’s bed. Both held Mr. Ashok’s hand tightly and Ansul started crying like a child. In a matter of 30 minutes, everything ended. Mr. Ashok had died due to lack of blood. Ansul felt a sudden emptiness in his life. He stopped crying and became quiet. He slowly took his hand off his father’s hand which was in blood. He went out of the room silently. Ansul life had come to a standstill. He could not understand what happened. He started feeling guilty that inspite of having same blood group, he could not save his father’s life.

It’s been 4 years since then; Ansul had quit drinking and partying. He had started caring about his mother like never before. His father’s death had an big impact in his life. He became responsible son, he took over the charge of his company and had done well to stand upto the reputation to rebuild his company.

Though he had many achievements in his 4 years but he had lost the most important person in his life. It took his father’s death to understand his responsibility, to understand himself. A void was created in his life. He feels everyday to roll back the days and think if he would not been drunk and taken any drugs that day then perhaps he would have saved his father. He is cursing himself, feeling guilty till date and everyday visits the hospital till now.

This story has many aspects to life – how things would have been different if Mr. Ashok would not have given everything to Ansul on whatever he demanded in his life, how things would been different if Ansul would not have gone to London to pursue his MBA and rather would have stayed in India and done his MBA from any reputed college. Would it have been different if Ansul would have understood his father’s advice? Would it have been different if Ansul would not have been under the influence of drugs and drinks? Would it have been different if Ansul would have joined his father’s business?

This makes me ponder – “WHAT WENT WRONG?”





FAILURE – A misunderstood world!

“You are a failure!”

How often have you heard this? Probably some of us many times and some perhaps seldom. Does it make you feel depressed, alone and give a odd one out feeling. The word FAILURE is so strong that it may instantly deprive you of your normalcy mindset. In my own life, I have heard many times – sometimes from friends, some times from parents & sometimes from within my own voice. The most dangerous is when we hear it from our own voice. All others are external factors. You are compared to a benchmark and then measured against it. Parents & teachers do it more often than anyone else. But if we look at it carefully, we absorb the same in different ways at different age and levels. As the time progressed, our reaction to it changes and we believe that failure is a part of life. Some of us are still struggling to understand the positive vibration of it till now.

Long back when I was a kid, I read in one of the monthly edition of READERS DIGEST that my father had subscribed which is instilled in my mind forever. I don’t remember about the writer but it goes something like this – “No No No No No…, the more number of No’s you hear, the more closer you are to Yes!”.It is so simple but so deeply thought words! It changed my life forever. If we think more deeply and can correlate that if you are hearing “No” word constantly inspite of you having the right intention then perhaps you are getting a feel of failure repeatedly but not realising that we are closer to “Yes”.

Think of the great scientist like Thomas Edison or Stephen Hawkins, innovators like Steve Jobs, freedom fighters like Mahatma Gandhi / Bhagat Singh, sports person like Milkha Singh / Muhamad Ali, etc. What would have happened if they would have given up after 1 or 2 or 3 failures, then perhaps we would have never witnessed greatness and the impossible things they had believed and dreamed in their life.

Lets see why Failure is so much misunderstood. It is the way, FAILURE is perceived and reciprocated by an individual. I believe that once you fail then you are an inch closer to Success. People take failure as a point where they are no good for themselves and the loved ones. This is where your own voice can come to your rescue. If you believe that failure is a point to stop then you have lost your path but if you think that you have learnt something worthwhile from this failure then it serves as a catalyst for your growth.

Remember it never ends until you stop!

There is lot of news now-a-days regarding “ALS Ice bucket Challenge”. Everyone must have seen it in all forms of media. But are we aware of what is it actually referred to and why ALS? ALS refers to “Amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (ALS), often referred to as “Lou Gehrig’s Disease,” is a progressive neurodegenerative disease that affects nerve cells in the brain and the spinal cord. Motor neurons reach from the brain to the spinal cord and from the spinal cord to the muscles throughout the body. The progressive degeneration of the motor neurons in ALS eventually leads to their death.” – referred from http://www.alsa.org. The famous scientist of our time – Stephen Hawkins has been diagnosed with this disease when he was doing his PhD from Cambridge University. He was only given 2 years to live at that time. But he has survived with it till now, where he is 71 years old. In the initial years he  was scared that he will not be able to complete his PhD. But he struggled and fought his life battle and published something astonishing – A Brief History of time. He failed many times and to add up his pain, his body was against it but he fought and he gave the world something to ponder for the rest of time. He is now only using his cheek muscle to interact with the world. Leave aside the technology but think about the perseverance and determination with which he has survived. Hasn’t he failed?

There are numerous examples of such failure stories who rose above it and achieved some impossible feats. People with strong mind and patience achieve super human stage.

Failure sounds cruel but it can be a life changing event for everyone. If the Failure is accepted with grace & humanity and reworked using correct path and pattern, nothing is impossible!

Failure can be devastating but it can be inspirational and it is the way we perceive it. Everyone has failed in their life including GOD (as in failing to understand women! 🙂 just kidding). As a kid we failed to understand our parents, mathematics, Science; As a youngster we failed to get good marks, get good girl friends / boyfriends,etc.; As a man we failed to understand our duty to our nation, parents, spouse, brothers/sisters, etc. So we can see that we keep on failing in life in different forms, at different levels, at different scenarios. But we always overcame it, for some we had to fight hard and for some we just sailed through it.

Today, as I write this, I am able to recollect all my major failures in life and I am trying to do a retrospective analysis. Now I think if I would have done that in a different way then perhaps the result would have been different. I am only trying to help myself and in process others to understand the importance of FAILURE and get the desired result!

As the famous saying goes “Failure is stepping stone to success”, so be a champ and achieve the impossible!

Remember – “FAILURE is getting you an INCH closer to success and your next failure might be your success”

If you feel that no one has failed more than you and all this are ridiculous then please have a look at the below link and think:


With Love & loads of success,

Biren Patnaik


Essence of positive mind

Many a times you will come across people who tell you to think positive, no matter in what situation you are in. But is it helpful in real world, is it enough, is it what counters negativity? For a moment lets think it’s just a thought or a word to make you comfortable. What you feel after that is important.  How you approach life after that will give you consequence. If a mere word of “I Love You” can make world of difference to you and make you a better person then how wrong is it to be positive? Think if certain words are enough to change your feelings then what impact a positive mindframe can do? There are circumstances when thinking positive won’t help you too. It requires actions too. So just being positive and not enacting will create the same environment as you are in at present. Few things requires only positive approach,  few need actions and few needs combination of both. You are the best judge for yourself. 

So think and enact accordingly to make yourself awesome and the environment around you awesome. You achieve awesomeness when you start to believe in yourself and instill confidence in yourself. You can achieve confidence when you see things positively.  You can see things positively when you believe that there is opportunity in everything around you.

So grab your opportunities and achieve Awesomeness. STAY POSITIVE 🙂